I’ve been friends with Flash’s owners for years. But when I say ‘friend’, I really mean ‘sister’ cause that’s closer to what we are now. I rode Flash off and on, had a few adventures and generally clicked with him fairly well over the years. However, he was said friend’s eldest daughter’s horse and I was working on a state salary so had no extra for a horse of my own. Borrowing and catch riding was how I got my fix.
Fast forward a few years and the daughter was now a teenager with eight million different, non horse related hobbies, my husband and I had seen several raises and job changes and purchased a house. My friend had been hinting, with less and less subtlety, that I was the only one they trusted to take Flash should the teenager be willing to part ways with him.
Then one day she finally just came out and asked me if I was ready to take him, meaning bring him to a barn closer to me and be his person. Rather cleverly, she had asked my husband first for the financial impact and having been given the go ahead, brought it to me. The stars aligned a month later a sweaty, gleaming Flash stepped off my friend’s astoundingly awesome custom built trailer and my bank account hasn’t been the same since!
Naturally, now I’m pregnant and rapidly approaching the “too unbalanced to ride” section. This is a surrogate pregnancy and something I’ve been working towards since before I met Tom, let alone brought Flash home. All my eventual goals and plans with Flash are a bit paused, which is both a good and slightly frustrating thing.
As this is a surrogate pregnancy, it means the child isn’t ours (and not related to us at all), it also means that safety and making solid, well informed decisions is paramount. I’m entrusted with growing and protecting someone else’s child (in this case, a gay couples first), and that requires totally different thinking from when I was 20 and working draft horses while cooking my own kid.
The biggest safety compromise I’ve made, between my OB (love her and her approach!) and the baby’s IF’s (intended father’s) is agreeing not to trail ride. I can arena ride, and hike trails with him, with adults around, until my regular pants don’t fit (which is coming up faster now that I’m at 19 weeks along). As my main objective with Flash is trail riding and camping, and it’s winter anyway, I’ve been focusing on ensuring we’re a team and getting my (first for me!) truck and trailer ready for August.
Once the babe is safely home and I’m at least through the immediate recovery phase (which I’ve heard is much faster without feeding and caring for a newborn!), my goal is to squeeze as many adventures into the summer and fall as I can.
I know that truly regaining full strength and all takes more time, but doing so with Flash and friends will definitely be the most enjoyable way through. In the meantime I have a more or less tolerant and helpful husband and a big golden treat hogger to ask crazy things of, like play soccer and load into a trailer without drama and let me fuss with his tail and kiss his nose as much as I want. Barn time, caring for and futzing with Flash is definitely helping through all the work stress and interrupted riding, helps curb my impatience for a cool lake and a warm campfire!